I want to paint on a canvas so big that it consumes my entire studio and immerses the whole of my soul.
I’m unsure of my current position. I really though living in a venue, being an artist and being social often would make me happy. It was for awhile, but it is no longer satisfying. I want to nest somewhere, in a home that I won’t have to leave. Maybe I should act like my current home is my nest, even if it is brief. Maybe if I nest so comfortably, no one could ask me to leave. Maybe then I could figure out who I’d want to nest with, who could fill my nest comfortably. Maybe I’m crazy.
Maybe. Always maybe.
I’m not really sure why but I can not get over my terrible ex. I think about him every stupid day. I think about how him and his girlfriend and cuddling on the couch and laughing together. Why couldn’t I get that? I did get that, for three months but I also got the cheater, the abuse, the boredom. I am being delusional. The life he would have given me is no where near the life that I want. He’s also way too old for me and has no energy. He sleeps all day and never wants to leave his home. He’s a retired drug dealer and a 36 yr old. undergraduate. He’s filthy and mean and boring. He’s also incredibly vain and doesn’t have a single drop of humility. His friends suck, he has no family, he has no real skills. He’s horribly jealous. I could never bring that fool around my family in a million years. Watching him work out was the weirdest thing ever. He is still married and said awful awful things to her. He claims he’ll never get married again and by the time he does, he’ll be forty. gross. He’s way too old for me.
I live in the colorful city of Houston, a spectrum filled with a myriad of decadent hues of musicians, artists, dancers, comedians, fashion designers and powerful minds that put the palette of hues into motion. These movers and shakers transcend, give a richness and breath to a oil-ridden city, from sexy debauchery to fragrant, gossamer sounds that awaken the sleeping kundalini.
I’d like to give these masters a crown, not a crown of rank but a crown of merit. A crown to symbolize the strength and beauty of their art, created with the elements of their work. An aesthetically visual head piece to encapsulate the way they vibrate.
Since antiquity, many cultures of various parts of the world have adorned themselves with various types of gorgeous, symbolic head ornaments that represent a powerful persona within their tribe. Within the Houston tribe, their are many leaders, varying personas that decorate and infuse the senses of this city.
This project will involve a portrait photograph of each of the ‘crowned.’ There will then be intimate research into chosen person where an idea will be formed. The photograph will then be sourced for a painting and or illustration where an individualized head piece we be designed and crowned on each person. Crowns could include elements such as flowers, masks, face paint, animals ears, horns, halos, garbage, planets, strawberries, diamonds, candies, rocks, gold, waterfalls, Christmas lights, turkey legs, the elements are limitless.
I’ll be contacting each artist, if you’re an interested artist, feel free to contact me at Hannahibelnectar@gmail.com.